Hello everyone! Im back on it 🙂 I haven’t had much time to actually write but I do have a couple topics in mind to write about for upcoming posts, so stay tuned. As for today, straight to our topic; What is “Happy Medium”? How is it “born”? What does it mean to me?
Happy Medium is a raw open space for growth and personal enrichment. For the longest time I wanted to come up with a space where I could combine all the different things that make me who I am today; my passions, the things I like, the things I struggle with, what I have learned and the art of mindful and balanced living. This space is born from my desire to share with others the journey of finding balance in our daily lives.
It is also a space for genuine sharing and it is a judgement-free zone. Everyone is different and there isn’t a specific set of rules to live by. It’s purpose is by no means to tell people how to live their lives, but to share ways and tools for people to find their Happy Medium. Everyone’s Happy Medium is unique.So, take what you need, share the love and go with the flow. With that being said, I would like to go a little deeper into my background, the meaning of Happy Mediums for me and why I live by it now.
Growing up in an athletic family where both my parents were international speed skaters (how cool huh?), I was exposed to a competitive and driven environment from a very young age. And, don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t change any of it if I could because it’s part of who I am today. With a combination of that background and my character (got it from my papa), I certainly became driven to be the best in everything I did and developed a perfectionist mentality, because you know, there’s always room for improvement. Now, having the perfectionist mentality(its an extreme trait) has its pros and cons, just like everything else in life. On the PRO side, I was highly motivated, determined, persistent and driven to achieve my goals, which also meant to be the best in EVERYTHING I did. That last part, not so good. I had trouble settling for anything less than that, meaning I had to be in control at all times, which turned out to be a huge emotional burden at times. These qualities certainly helped me achieve my goals as a volleyball player. I was able to obtain a full scholarship for volleyball at a Div I school and then eventually play professional. But my overall perfectionist mentality took a toll on my physical and emotional life, specially when things never felt good enough and I ended up beating myself for it. Growing up I was always underestimated, therefore proving others wrong was my main fuel and eventually I became obsessed with being the best in everything I did; including but not limited to getting stronger, working out, being an A+ student-athlete, eating healthy, being a good girlfriend, looking good, always dressed to impress, etc… Plain and simple, it was a constant competition. That, right there, is the perfectionist side of the spectrum. Then there’s the “I don’t give a crap” part of the spectrum, which is mostly negative things like lack of motivation/no drive/no goal orientation,etc… which I experienced quite often because trying to be the best in everything is absolutely ridiculous and it drains you so much, that you have to take breaks, and theres no halfway for that. Just like diets, if you starve yourself for a couple days, you will most likely binge eat at some point. I had become an all-or-nothing type. Neither side was working out for me, and so thats how I realised I needed to find that perfect spot, right in between both worlds, my own Happy Medium.
Right after graduating college, many things changed. I moved back to my parents house in Puerto Rico after 5 years in New York and thats where my journey begins. All of a sudden my life was no longer revolving around volleyball; the one and only thing I knew how to do and did for the past decade. Now I had to find a job and earn a living. I was just starting a relationship and short story, I was in absolutely no control of how everything was unfolding. Actually, I was doing exactly what I had not planned. After a few weeks back in PR, I found a job where I certainly was not the best; it included public speaking, or should I say public singing. Jesus lord! How did I end up working with babies (who I had absolutely no experience with) and having to sing in public (when only the thought of it made me nauseous). Long story short, life took me to the right place at the right moment. It took me to a place filled with life lessons and beautiful people. And all of a sudden, after years of beating myself for not being good enough, I set myself free. At age 24, I picked up yoga and meditations and many things started to make sense and I realised how important balance was to a healthy and happy life. I found value in the little things, but it wasn’t the same little things I used to focus on before. It was about the little things in the present moment. And the little things I could control., like my attitude, my awareness, my patience. Through yoga and meditation I learned to control my self awareness, my ability to stay present, and most of all the ability to be patient(Yes, patience can be learned). Now a days, there are a couple of things I keep in mind on a daily basis that leads the way of finding my daily Happy Mediums in the day by day circumstances. Here a few of them:
1)It’s much easier to work on little short-term goals or meaningful intentions that will take you to a bigger dream or goal.
2)Life isn’t necessarily about being the best in something, specially not in everything. Life is about purpose. Life is about balance.
3)Nothing in life is black or white/all-or-nothing. We gotta give and take a bit.
4)Being the best at something is pretty awesome…but doing something you love, with a purpose will make you truly happy… and thats priceless!
5)There is a Happy Medium in everything in life… You just have to be willing to find it.
And my favourite one… Life happens somewhere in between the highs and the lows, and thats exactly where happiness is.
I hope you enjoyed getting to know me on a deeper level and learning about where Happy Medium comes from. Stay tuned for many more fun and enriching posts to come. And don’t forget to work on your August intentions because September is just around the corner.
Stay balanced and live fully,